Living Much

This picture was sent to me from an acquaintance friend out of Europe.  Kind of funny since I am a Leo and it shows the fire in my ora.  As time passes I tried to go back to things I used to d when we met, yet they don't work out for me and I almost kill myself doing things I've been so far out of reach. My soul is on fire, fire from being hurt and lied too.  You think it doesn't affect me and like nothing happened, yet you lie to tell the truth. Well, what truth is in a lie.  Consistent white lies wrapped in the skeletons in your head. Me, being the one that has been through hell a couple times already ca read the narcissist ways you have. I wish I had known more about the meaning of that when we met. I wouldn't be here today. I wouldn't be empty, trying to refill my soulless body you took away what was left while I was trying to pick up my already broken pieces.   I no longer give a fk. I'm trying my best to listen, yet again all I hear is lies. In try ...

Within the month I have lost me, again.  I planned a year without knowing but just to be there for someone who doesn't have empathy and is a gas lighter. I never knew about the meanings of these things until I started following a few people who seemed to be on the page I fell onto. What I can say is WOW, I have been around this my whole life and never been taught about the real meaning of those life codes with so much more. I talked to a pastor today and he can see right through me. He can see I AM hurt.  As he put it, it's an addiction. An addiction to a human trait many of us have, but will never understand. Nothing ever to do with drugs, but the way we choose the people around us, what we fall for. See I found another man (ego builder) who likes everything but me. He will choose to like other peoples info and friend girls he may or may not know and leave me out of his picture. The whole picture, I belong to no one but me. At my ae I should only expect it, right? ...